So 5 Elves Walk into a Bar...

A New Teammate Appears!

Nale stabilizing Daemior, Daemior wonders where the saving grace came from. As he was about to voice his opinion, a rather disheveled human approaches, cradling a crossbow in the crook of his arm. Introducing himself to the party as Jerkin Jack, he begins to explain his reasoning for being in this cave in the first place, with Nale being understandably suspicious. As Jack was explaining his reasons for laying low and allowing his capture in the first place, the party is attacked by what appears to be a dire badger! No one asking what a dire badger was doing there in the first place, the party begins to fight it. Lelouch, utilizing his draconic heritage, was able to spot that this badger had a nefarious master, a kobold of ill repute. After barely overcoming the magical sleep spell cast by the kobold, Lelouch alerted the rest of the party to this magical being, then proceeded to attack it. After the badger is destroyed and the kobold nearly dead, the kobold disappears and flees down the tunnel, vacating the dangerous proximity it had to the party. Seeing as the battle was over, Daemior vents some of his anger out on the baby troglodytes nearby by kicking the corpse of the badger onto the large mass of them, which is no small feat, considering the size of the badger and the height of the ceiling. The party searches the kobold’s chamber, and discover some loot, which they pocket. Heading ever upwards towards the entrance to the dungeon, the party comes upon an alluring door. For no logical reason, the party is fascinated by it, and opens it. Inside, eternally prepared, is a trap that sprays the party with alchemist’s fire! The party manages to put it out shortly, except for Daemior, who dances around on fire until Mave puts him out with the displacer beast strapped to his back. Suitably humbled, the party travels onward, disrupting a group of orcs eating. Intimidating them, they learn that there is a large orc not 50 feet from them. Traveling onwards, Jack discovers a door with a bloody skull nailed to it, almost in welcome. Jack also notices that there is a trap guarding the area around this door, and the party suggests arming it before opening the door. Jack does so, opens the door, and is greeted by the Great Ulfe and his two wolves! Crying “You think to challenge the Great Ulfe? Vak, Thrag, at them!”, they all charge Jack. He promptly shuts the door. Ulfe and the wolves open the door. Ulfe immediately recognizes what Jack has done, but the wolves are so eager to attack the intruders that they step on the pressure plate. The party, having had scant time to prepare, made short work of the wolves. Daemior, having bolstered himself with the strength of a bull and arming himself with his vicious mace, lands a mighty blow upon the Great Ulfe. The Great Ulfe’s head is launched clear across the room, with half of it still present on Daemior’s mace.


This is the transcript. I found it amusing. Thanks Lelouch for taking notes

*We meet sketchy, yet well dressed, rogue.

  • Zoinks! Invisible shit and a badger appear. We scrap. I pass the fuck out via magic sleep
  • I made a deal with Copernicus if I crit I wake up. HahaHA!!! Against all odds I defeat narcolepsy and crit awaken
  • Dammit! Badger blood is bleeding out all over my Persian rug! Suddenly a buff trog who was invisible dipsets. We raid his house and Daemior throws a bloody badger at baby trogs. Righteous.
  • Backtrack and search. We pen the door and get blasted by alchemist fire. We are all on fire and put blue out with the displacer beast scorpse. This never happened….
  • We go south and find 3 orcs we disrupt their dinner. To the max
  • Pee Break……5 minutes later…
  • We storm into a room of 4 orcs. I cow them and we interrogate them, rob them, and burn them.
    Jack disables an acid trap surrounded by blood and so we rejoice. We observe a bloody skull knocker on a door. We flash mob it! Psych he flash mobbed us with 2 wolves. This shit is bananas.
  • So I close the door and jerkin jack re sets the booby trap. Very nice. Luke proceeds to summon a dire badger. The eager wolves foolishly sprang the trap and got acid gassed. An epic battle ensues/ one wolf bleeds out. We use the animals as meat shields while we shoot over/pass them. Summon badger dissipated. Daemior HELLA crits with bull strength and undescribable things happen to Ulef(the great)
  • We search and Mave carries shit
A New Teammate Appears!

I'm sorry, but we no longer support this web browser. Please upgrade your browser or install Chrome or Firefox to enjoy the full functionality of this site.